More New Dumb Customer Tricks

*A longtime disability check cashing customer, with a perpetually pissed-off demeanor, we'll call her "Buehla". She has not cracked a smile or said anything nice in the years I've had to deal with her, ever! I learned a long time ago to not ask her anything other than questions related to our transaction, otherwise she uses it as an opportunity to be nasty. She also gets a check for her adult son, and she insists that each check be cashed separately. (Even though when she is done, she puts all the money into one envelope) She insists that we photocopy the checks for her also, and 'COUNT IT BACK TO ME SLOWLY SO I KNOW IT'S THERE!" (Yes, she really does sound like she's talking in all caps!) In the past she has claimed that we shorted her, even though the money was counted out to her, so we have to watch her carefully. She tried to claim recently that I shorted her money to her and I wouldn't have any of it, so she shut up. She pinched her mouth into a tight little pout and crossed her arms and was breathing heavily through her nose as she stood there glaring at me. (Have you ever seen a 5'5" 300 lb. toddler pout?)

She loves to stand there and comment on the jewelry cases; we have several of them and she must have tried on everything at least twice. She isn't going to buy anything mind you, she just wants you to take it out, let her try it on, bitch about it (wrong size/color/style/price/it's fake even though it's not/etc.). What's this, why is it that color, is this real, how much did you pay for it, who did you buy it from, how do you know it's real or not, why should she believe what you are saying, etc. She really doesn't want to know these things, she just can't keep the negative stream from flowing out of her mouth. Mind you, she has no qualms about telling you to take out jewelry for her, when you are in the middle of helping someone else; she's really something! She bought a dvd player from us awhile back and bitched about it for a couple of months; she bitched about a CD she bought and didn't like, ditto with a movie, etc. It's like once you sell her something, you have this physical relationship with her and she feels that she needs to tell you how much you suck in bed. She won't stop beating the dead horse until you ignore her, and then she'll move on to something else.

*Kobie couple came in; Mr. Kobie has just been diagnosed with cancer apparently. Now he and the missus used to be meth heads, and the way he was going off about how his doctors 'treat him like he's drug seeking' makes me wonder just what else they did. He used to be a patient of a local doctor who is so notorious for his prescribing habits that other doctors will not see you if you have been a patient of this doctor. But Mr. Kobie is on Medicaid (he and the missus have been cashing social security checks for years, and get one for the kid too) and the doctors who take the Medicaid must treat him. The doctor with the bad prescribing habits lost his ability to take Medicaid payments after some fraud allegations, so those people had to go somewhere else. Apparently though the new doctors are not responsive to his requests for pain medication, which translates into them 'treating him like a drug addict'. Well, you are...were...whatever, how are they SUPPOSED to treat you? He also won't stop smoking despite a nasty cough secondary to his cancer, but he insists that the smoking is not making him cough. (Can meth cause cancer, I wonder?? Surely it can, as nasty as it is to smoke LYE for gawdssakes). Mr. Kobie said, "I can't wait until Obama's health care kicks in and then they have to give me meds!" Um, you are ON government health care and you hate how you are treated, do you think honestly, that it's going to get better? Yes, you sure are a druggie! I might add that while they were there they paid a $150 cable bill. Yes, you are welcome, Kobie Couple!

*The woman with the 'miracle baby' came in today. Miracle Troll is about two years old I think, and he has a mohawk. A MOHAWK. Didn't this white trash trend DIE yet? It's worse than a mullet! It looks like the kid's face hasn't grown the same way as the rest of his skull, it's almost like he's been laying on a couch with a bottle in his mouth for the last year. Totally flat on the back of his head, with an underbite that makes him look like a Bulldog, and completely NO parental discipline as the little miracle child ran amok. (Do you think she'd be offended if I handed out condoms in her bag?)