Lick it, lick it good! And Boobie Money

I used to think the nastiest thing ever was being handed hot, wet, sweaty money out of bras. Wadded, cramped, damp, stinky money that's been nestled between or under sagging hot titties for....how long...?? Unwashed sagging titties on top of that. I decided some time ago that I will not take it if it's wet and sweaty, there surely has to be some kind of disease one could get from it? I'm sorry ladies, but damn. Get a purse! Put it in your pocket! Don't saturate it with your bodily fluids and then expect me to TOUCH IT! (If it comes out of a waistband, FORGET IT!)
But today, today was a new low in gross. Until today, my SECOND most repulsive pet peeve was watching someone lick or suck their fingers to get their rings off. Then they'd hand it to me, still wet, expecting me to take it in my bare hands like swapping spit with them was something we do together on a regular basis. They would never ask for lotion until AFTER they'd slobbered all over their jewelry, yet it was no big deal to them that the jewelry they were trying to hand me was saturated with DNA. Would you hand someone a ring dipped in snot, or semen, or vomit? Why would one dripping with spit be any better? Today I actually told a lady who was slobbering on her ring in an attempt to get it off: here's some hand sanitizer, use that. She refused, "I almost have it off!" I told her we don't take jewelry that has saliva all over it, so just use the hand sanitizr when you are done. (Then I handed her some Purell out of my purse). She looked at me like I was really being unrealistic in my expectations but I swear to you here and now: if she had not put sanitizer on it, I would not have touched it. If you knew this lady you would be fearful of catching some latent STD from the slobber, she's that gross. Sorry lady. Ew.
Also high on the list of Ick Factor: women who bring in earrings that they have not cleaned off. Almost unbearable to me are the ones that pull them straight out of their ears and hand them to me. I have to look at them under extreme magnification to see what the karat marking is, if they are real, etc. There, on the post, without fail, smegma-like crusty deposits from being inside their ears! Can you NOT clean your jewelry, PLEASE?? I have to get that jewelry right up by my nose to see it under the magnifier, and all that gunky crust makes me just want to heave.
Don't be nasty! I don't want your bodily excretions!!!!!!!!!!