Money Scammers

I've had it up to !!HERE!! with customers who try to claim that they only have ____ when it's time to pay for an item. I'm not trying to single out any one nationality but a certain group of folks around here likes to buy stuff and claim they "only have a twenty" or "only have a fifty" when their total is significantly more. What really chaps my ass, is that they just whined their way into a discount on top of that! Take Long Duck Dong for example. (Yes truly he looks just like The Donger!) I used to like this guy when he came in but now when I see him, I know that it's going to be a painful transaction! He likes to trash whatever merchandise he's looking at, there is always a reason why he doesn't get whatever it is you have taken the time to remove from the display case and show him. If he does buy one it's like you are taking advantage of him. He likes to return things. He expects a 20 year warranty with every 90% off purchase; you get the idea. The other day he bought something, then decided five minutes later that the motor was bad, and got a refund, then spent 15 minutes looking at an item that I had to dig out of a display case to show him...and THEN announced it was not a good deal (yes 75% less than current retail price is such a ripoff!) and left the store. By the way, the item he claimed had a bad motor was in like-new condition. Now, the twenty-year-old whale-tail-sporting Honda Civic he drove off in, THAT needed a new motor! So he bought something and whined his way into a discount (I wasn't going to give him one because of his transaction history of returns and such but hey I'm just an employee). I gave him his total and he said, "I only have feeftee!" I repeated his total and he tried to do the turn-your-pocket-inside-out kind of routine. Bite me Donger, you cheap bastard! So I told him that's ok it will be here tomorrow if you want to come back. WHOA what is this? MORE money magically appears out of your empty pockets?? Amazing! To be fair it's not just the Long Duck Dongs, I've heard customers from all of White Trash Morondom wheedle their way out of the change portion of their orders a LOT lately. It goes without saying that I don't let them get away with it but hey I'm just a raging bitch like that. *When you buy your cigarettes, you don't tell the gas station clerk you only have five dollars! *When you buy your cheap booze at the liquor store, you don't get your bottles til you fork over your whole total! *When you pay your cable bill if you don't pay all of it they turn it off! DItto with your cell phone, internet, etc.! *If you don't pay for your fake nails, the tech doesn't do them for you! *When you buy your fake Chanel and Dolce bags, ...well ok maybe the flea market will dicker with you How would they like it if the state told them, sorry you only get $142 of your foodstamps this month! We don't have the .50 extra you are supposed to get. There would be MUTINY!